Jan 01, 2014 9:32 PM

Great read...

Since Jan 1,2013, I have grown immensely. This year is the year I am no longer a computer idiot!!!!

Great article. !!!!!

oh fuck I am not reading this.....I am enough good as it is :-P

I read it.... :-\

You didn't read it in 12 mins...no way!

Huh, good article. Wow. "But, I can put on make-up really well! and I take my dog for a walk everyday." :/

I even had the time to copy and paste it Chris Evan... :D

#6. The World Only Cares About What It Can Get from You

#5. The Hippies Were Wrong

#4. What You Produce Does Not Have to Make Money, But It Does Have to Benefit People

#3. You Hate Yourself Because You Don't Do Anything

#2. What You Are Inside Only Matters Because of What It Makes You Do

#1. Everything Inside You Will Fight Improvement

I am the Executive Editor of Cracked.com and NYT bestselling author David Wong, which is the pseudonym of a real person named Jason Pargin.

:D

oh hu, did i miss somthin? i was smokin the pipe again... hippies are... still waitin for jerry... heads all empty and i dont care...

"Name five impressive things about yourself. Write them down or just shout them out loud to the room. But here's the catch -- you're not allowed to list anything you are (i.e., I'm a nice guy, I'm honest), but instead can only list things that you do (i.e., I just won a national chess tournament, I make the best chili in Massachusetts)." Um... OK.

1: I Write. A LOT, and EVERYONE (even the people who hate me) LEARNS.

2: There is NOTHING I can't do with a computer.

3: I tell the truth, when others won't, no matter the cost.

4: I lie to deceivers and I do it well

5: I'm the admiral of a private navy, filled with really smart officers who live and die at my command.

6: I am in the middle of collapsing the banking system and starting a war.

7: I profoundly understand women to a level where I reap all the benefits and endure none of the drawbacks of the gender.

8: Everything I do, I do BETTER than everyone else; This list is an example.

9: I am a GREAT composer.

10: I dedicate 4 hours a day to study, so I will ALWAYS know more than you.

:P

Pffft... GIVE ME A CHALLENGE, CRACKED!

And I have heard you can cook too ? o_O

If I do more than ten... when asked only for 5, it seems the "showing off" line gets crossed. I'll include the cooking part the next time such a list is needed.

Right now I have too many women cooking for me to be bragging about that shit. I'm not giving up on that.

Ha, it's nothin' but Bulk Barn pancakes for you now, mister! :D

Pfft... ONE woman not cooking for me is something I can handle. That's why I keep spares :P

Don't you have that annoying Christian friend whose only offer to help anyone ever is to "pray for them"?-This is definitely not limited to Christians. I once had a friend who said he was going to "rub his buddha's belly" in response to a story of my child being treated unlawfully (AND illegally). I wanted to scream at him "YA! Cause that will fix it!" It seems most of society has decided that Pacifism is their REAL religion.

ALL religion teaches pacifism, Cara. It's all the same programming with different packaged bullshit.

The most evil, ignorant, violent, misogynist ideology, calls itself "The Religion of Peace".

1. I can train horses and dogs (and cats when they are willing hehe) 2. I can grow food 3. I live off grid 4. I can sew, knit, crochet, and cook 5. I can build a house 6. I can drive a forklift AND am a certified trainer (not that I need THEIR permission) 7. I can slaughter and process many animals 8. I can argue any point, even if I disagree with said point

AND I AM one fuckasaorous!